[ No don't threaten to get up she really doesn't want that. ] You can build me a fire tomorrow. Or anytime I can come with you. Not now. No moving now. [ Importance is the mother of repetition, and of holding onto his hand a little tighter. ] Lots of people can't make fire, it's nothing to be ashamed of.
[ Don't worry, he got your oh-so-subtle hint and isn't going anywhere. Besides. He's comfy here too. ] I'm not ashamed of it, because I can make fire. And I also just have, you know, a criminally small amount of shame in general. I don't need to be wasting it on a nonessential skill.
[ She is so subtle. The subtlest! She's proud of it. ] Criminal is right. Are you ashamed of anything? [ Genuinely curious, if quietly absent minded. ]
[ She should call bullshit right now, and she's like three seconds less tired from doing so, so just give her a moment to squint up at him unconvinced before she says anything. ] Too cocky?
Haven't had any complaints so far. I imagine someone would have complained by this point if it was too much for them. [ 'It'. js. And yes, he's not going to give you a straight answer about this. Not unless you directly ask for one. ]
[ Face, again, because really. And she may not be her usual on top of things self, but he's not actually doing that great a job of deflecting, here. ] You're beating around the question.
[ His face right now has because mildly guarded, although it's mostly saying 'are we seriously getting into this. really.' ] Of course I am. [ Now whether that's about beating around the question or if he has any shame or embarrassment, is up to her. ]
[ Man now she's torn between the not liking his face going guarded and that she's just off enough to be willing to go after the answers she wants. ] Why?
[ She pushes a little bit closer to him, arm across him solid. She's not going anywhere no matter how he answers it. ] Why are you ashamed of whatever it is you're ashamed of?
[ The gesture feels simultaneously comforting and confining. And that... That's kind of an out. He doesn't have to say what it is, specifically, but just the impact. He can probably manage that. After a few moments of silence as he pieces the wording together very carefully, at least. ] Their memories didn't need that. I should have just grown up.
[ Solidly there and not confining is always a tough balance to reach, and right now she's not sure how to achieve it other than try to shift her body enough to make it clear that if he wanted to get up she wouldn't stop him but that she's not going to move away by herself willingly. It's a complicated message to convey just by body language. She takes a moment to contemplate that wording, turn it over in her mind. ] Whose memories?
[ Normally she would probably have achieved it by now, but at the moment he's just sort of going to scowl a little, not that she can necessarily see that very well, and shift positions. Not much, but he's increasingly antsy now and needs to move to relieve the feeling. ] Guess. [ Or don't guess. It's nearly as much a challenge as it is a stall tactic. Stonewalling, just to make her ask again if she really wants to know. ]
[ She has to force herself to not instinctively tighten her grip around him at that shift, both because it would hurt and because him moving away is the last thing she wants right now. But she's not willing to abandon this line of questioning any more. ] Your parents. [ Not really a guess so much as a quiet certainty. She's fairly sure she has it right. ]
[ Yeah he remembered somewhere in the process why he was lying down with her and stopped, because he's an asshole, but he's not enough of one to get up and leave someone who's just been seriously injured and happened to stumble into an area he didn't want to talk about and do so without telling them anything enough so that they know why it is that he's leaving. He'd have to be a genuinely shitty person to do that, he thinks, and he's trying really hard not to be that shitty person anymore.
That does not, however, actually mean that he opens back up or anything. Just that he's staying, giving her the comfort and solidness and protection she needs.
He's just... not at all sure how to proceed here anymore, which is obvious in the total lack of venom in his words. In fact, they're almost light - sort of distracted. ] I knew you could do it.
[ He's really good at not being a shitty person, and she'll insist that she's right about that forever. Especially given this evidence, because if she was more self aware right now she wouldn't be driving this topic at a moment when she knows he'd feel guilty about leaving because that's not a great thing to do.
There's a long pause, and then she sighs a little. ] I'm sorry they died.
[ Okay while he totally gets the dreaming part, the second part just earns her a kind of startled, hollow laugh. ]
Whatever wasn't documented physically between US Weekly and the National Inquirer is gonna be on youtube. You can look it up for yourself later. [ Because he's not doing this right now.
That does, of course, lend to the question of what they will do then. ] You wanna watch a movie or something? Listen to music?
Can I punch them? The tabloids, I mean. [ Because wow fuck that, grieving kids shouldn't have to deal with tabloids on top of that and the way his laugh sounded right there made her so immeasurably angry for a moment. ] I'm not gonna look it up. [ If he's not going to tell her, she doesn't want to know. The point isn't finding out by herself. It never is.
A moment of restless shifting, an exhale, and she makes an expression with her face that could pass for a shrug under the right circumstances. ] I don't know what I want.
You can, but it would be about twenty five years out of date. I doubt any of the same people are working there now. [ It wouldn't help anything now anyway. Tabloids are as much a part of life as metal, at this point.
Also just saying he's not sure what to do with the 'not looking it up' thing. Curiosity is one thing - wanting to hear it only from him is something else entirely. ]
How about what you don't want? I'll start - you don't want to dream.
Then I'll track them down individually and punch them. [ Something she would actually consider a reasonable use of her skillset. Those are bad guys.
The outside view isn't the one that really gives her any insight. Sure, a glossed over version of events, but it doesn't tell her the reality of it or how he felt about it, and that's what she cares about, so. And okay, that's - well, it's a reasonable start. ]
I don't want to remember. But I'm not supposed to get drunk on medication, am I.
[ She'll have to ask him something like that when he's in a state such that he already feels vulnerable and okay with exposing just a bit more. Until then, she's going to get deflections. ]
I'm not actually a doctor, so if you want to get drunk on medication, I can probably swing that.
[ She'll find that moment someday, or at least she'll certainly keep a definite eye out for it. She wants to know everything, which is hypocritical of her but she's okay with that. ]
You are so a doctor. That's terrible doctoring etiquette. At least your bedside manner's good.
Edited (IDK WHAT I'M DOING) 2013-01-24 05:24 (UTC)
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That does not, however, actually mean that he opens back up or anything. Just that he's staying, giving her the comfort and solidness and protection she needs.
He's just... not at all sure how to proceed here anymore, which is obvious in the total lack of venom in his words. In fact, they're almost light - sort of distracted. ] I knew you could do it.
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There's a long pause, and then she sighs a little. ] I'm sorry they died.
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Ancient history. You should be resting.
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What did you do?
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Whatever wasn't documented physically between US Weekly and the National Inquirer is gonna be on youtube. You can look it up for yourself later. [ Because he's not doing this right now.
That does, of course, lend to the question of what they will do then. ] You wanna watch a movie or something? Listen to music?
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A moment of restless shifting, an exhale, and she makes an expression with her face that could pass for a shrug under the right circumstances. ] I don't know what I want.
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Also just saying he's not sure what to do with the 'not looking it up' thing. Curiosity is one thing - wanting to hear it only from him is something else entirely. ]
How about what you don't want? I'll start - you don't want to dream.
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The outside view isn't the one that really gives her any insight. Sure, a glossed over version of events, but it doesn't tell her the reality of it or how he felt about it, and that's what she cares about, so. And okay, that's - well, it's a reasonable start. ]
I don't want to remember. But I'm not supposed to get drunk on medication, am I.
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I'm not actually a doctor, so if you want to get drunk on medication, I can probably swing that.
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You are so a doctor. That's terrible doctoring etiquette. At least your bedside manner's good.
lmao
cries
it'll be okay
are you sure
trust me, i'm a doctor.
you are not a doctor but i trust you regardless
i might be one, someday
that would be so cool i would basically call you doctor at every opportunity. doctor jansen
like, 89% of the reason i want to be a doctor, tbh
how do you feel about the weather today, doctor. tell me your feelings, doctor. all day every day
doctor who?
i can't remember
awwww yeah
that is super effective
y thx
(doctor)
Ph. D.
work it
move that bitch kuh-crazy
grabby hands
well i thought i had it but i can't find it one day i will
i will wait
~for you baby~~~
you're so nice to me 8D
<3<3
ily2
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