[ It has been a serious waste of good foreplay, honestly.
And for that - there's just so much about all of this he doesn't know, which is in and of itself very uncomfortable even beyond the actual content of everything. The gentleness of the touch, the way she follows him when he tries to turn away from her, how careful she's being with everything here from the phrasing to the orchestrated aspect of the situation. The sheer openness of her mind, not invasive, not forcing anything, but there if he wants or needs it, the way she's simply asking him to accept something she's even brought up before a few times, and not actually forcing him to. Asking him quite emphatically, perhaps, but not forcing him to do anything.
It's the please, really. The please and the continued almost actual pleading that does it, he thinks, that causes that tightness and pressure to finally start to force his eyes to water and what the fuck is that, right, that's totally ridiculous. He doesn't want to do that right now. But he's not about to call attention to it either. He's not sure how to answer her though, because he isn't sure he can believe her, but he doesn't want to force her into showing him anything neither of them is actually prepared to handle. ]
no subject
And for that - there's just so much about all of this he doesn't know, which is in and of itself very uncomfortable even beyond the actual content of everything. The gentleness of the touch, the way she follows him when he tries to turn away from her, how careful she's being with everything here from the phrasing to the orchestrated aspect of the situation. The sheer openness of her mind, not invasive, not forcing anything, but there if he wants or needs it, the way she's simply asking him to accept something she's even brought up before a few times, and not actually forcing him to. Asking him quite emphatically, perhaps, but not forcing him to do anything.
It's the please, really. The please and the continued almost actual pleading that does it, he thinks, that causes that tightness and pressure to finally start to force his eyes to water and what the fuck is that, right, that's totally ridiculous. He doesn't want to do that right now. But he's not about to call attention to it either. He's not sure how to answer her though, because he isn't sure he can believe her, but he doesn't want to force her into showing him anything neither of them is actually prepared to handle. ]