[ Yes, it was a terrible, terrible misuse of power and she doesn't regret it at all right now because that was kind of a really hilarious noise he just made. The lack of use of her hands does make it a little bit difficult to really do something, but she's pretty flexible, and wrapping her legs around his torso is the first step to hopefully gaining the necessary leverage to getting them free. ]
A minute. [ Shaking his head a little bit. He doesn't need anything else. He doesn't want anything else. Not right now. He just wants to sit calmly and slowly be positive that he's actually where he thinks he is, because it's not like he didn't check out there a few times as well.
But she's here, and that's different. He can't replicate her calming influence or the pressure of her hands and the way his senses are quietly running background checks and ensuring that everything is being responded to appropriately through cross-checks and double checks and every kind of check they can think of. You can lie to yourself, and delude yourself, but there's only so much you can do even in that respect, because there's no way to ever account for all of the variables. ] Just one. I'll be fine, I'm good. How are you, did I ask that yet?
But she's here, and that's different. He can't replicate her calming influence or the pressure of her hands and the way his senses are quietly running background checks and ensuring that everything is being responded to appropriately through cross-checks and double checks and every kind of check they can think of. You can lie to yourself, and delude yourself, but there's only so much you can do even in that respect, because there's no way to ever account for all of the variables. ] Just one. I'll be fine, I'm good. How are you, did I ask that yet?
[ Shut up no it wasn't. :| ]
You are such a goddamn cheater, you know that? [ It's more or less just grunted out as he tries to keep her in place - which goes... Okay. It doesn't go quite how he wants it to, although it doesn't exactly help that he seems to just get more desperate and less strategic the more it seems like she might be about to escape. ]
You are such a goddamn cheater, you know that? [ It's more or less just grunted out as he tries to keep her in place - which goes... Okay. It doesn't go quite how he wants it to, although it doesn't exactly help that he seems to just get more desperate and less strategic the more it seems like she might be about to escape. ]
Okay. As many minutes as you want. [ She can't offer a great deal, but she can smooth her fingers over his cheekbones, down along his arms and to stroke the back of his hands for a moment before she cradles his face again, reassurance in any physical way she can offer it and in her mind close, seeking to put herself between him and his memories.
The checks and the cross-checks, she can't speed that up or help this place be more real to him through anything but her presence. She can only hope that helps enough. ] I'm fine, I promise, you don't need to worry about me. Just remembering where you are, okay? [ Because she knows spacing out, knows the fear that you're actually back there and not here, that your mind is just putting you somewhere better temporarily. She doesn't want him to have to think that. ]
The checks and the cross-checks, she can't speed that up or help this place be more real to him through anything but her presence. She can only hope that helps enough. ] I'm fine, I promise, you don't need to worry about me. Just remembering where you are, okay? [ Because she knows spacing out, knows the fear that you're actually back there and not here, that your mind is just putting you somewhere better temporarily. She doesn't want him to have to think that. ]
[ It totally was, she's very pleased with herself right now in general. At first the only response to that is a laugh, low and entirely pleased with herself, because she's trying to figure out if she can flip him from here. ]
First rule of combat, Tony. [ A little breathless in turn because she just wants her hands back and he's being rather unpredictable and making it pretty difficult here, not to mention being taller and heavier enough that once even partway pinned getting out isn't easy without more drastic measures. ]
First rule of combat, Tony. [ A little breathless in turn because she just wants her hands back and he's being rather unpredictable and making it pretty difficult here, not to mention being taller and heavier enough that once even partway pinned getting out isn't easy without more drastic measures. ]
[ It's helpful, actually, the touch. It's more helpful than it probably has any real right to be, and if he were anyone less than Tony Stark he would probably be clinging to it far more obviously than he is already. As it stands, he gradually leans into her a little more, the more he feels convinced of the setting the more he allows the setting to convince him. ]
I'm right here. [ And if that's said almost as much to convince himself as it is to convince her that he's really okay, then so be it. He can probably handle that right now, so long as some convincing actually happens. ] Right here, you're here. I'm where you are, and you're okay, you're safe, so I'm-- [ Transitive property, right? He loves that one. It lets you get away with so much. In theory. ]
I'm right here. [ And if that's said almost as much to convince himself as it is to convince her that he's really okay, then so be it. He can probably handle that right now, so long as some convincing actually happens. ] Right here, you're here. I'm where you are, and you're okay, you're safe, so I'm-- [ Transitive property, right? He loves that one. It lets you get away with so much. In theory. ]
[ She probably can if she waits for the right moment. He's not paying enough attention to his center of gravity right now, focused too much on keeping her in place and not enough on himself for the same. Her laughter doesn't really help his concentration at all. ]
What, seduce your opponent? Still feels like cheating.
What, seduce your opponent? Still feels like cheating.
[ She's been avoiding leaning in too closely with the rest of her body so that she doesn't crowd him, but when he leans into her touch she rests her forehead against his, safe and nonthreatening but still helpful, hopefully. ]
We're in the bedroom. I think JARVIS is mad at me because your vitals have been confusing him. [ She can just keep giving him information if necessary. Whatever it takes. ] You're safe, nothing's going to happen to you. I promise. [ She doesn't make promises lightly, but this one she means thoroughly. If anyone tried to make that one a lie it would not end well for them. ] I'm proud of you.
We're in the bedroom. I think JARVIS is mad at me because your vitals have been confusing him. [ She can just keep giving him information if necessary. Whatever it takes. ] You're safe, nothing's going to happen to you. I promise. [ She doesn't make promises lightly, but this one she means thoroughly. If anyone tried to make that one a lie it would not end well for them. ] I'm proud of you.
Don't ever get distracted, actually.
[ Ha, yes, right moment achieved and she's back on top, if the awkwardness of the positioning means that one of her legs is still partially under him. She hasn't wrenched her hands free yet but for the moment she just spreads them on either side of his head and leans down to kiss him again. ]
And that was not seduction.
[ Ha, yes, right moment achieved and she's back on top, if the awkwardness of the positioning means that one of her legs is still partially under him. She hasn't wrenched her hands free yet but for the moment she just spreads them on either side of his head and leans down to kiss him again. ]
And that was not seduction.
JARVIS hates the reactor for that enough as it is, he doesn't need to hate you too. [ That's more or less to JARVIS, just to ensure that there's no hate amongst his favourite things, right?
But he has to agree, his vitals are insane right now. Heart so fast it's irregular beats are noisy and the norm. Adrenaline pumping for no reason, no where to go but around and adound. Everything feels weird. Especially his mouth, his tongue, his throat, his hands; he can't.
He tunes back in enough to hear that she's proud of him, and that.
That.
Just by itself, that nearly breaks him. Actually it does break him, and where he's gone to lean into her he does so more, quietly keeping his emotions to himself as much as he can but goddamn it's like every buzzword in his life at once and he can't always handle it.
His voice is thick, deep with concern and grief, but hoarse with work and other things, and he's just going to stay where he is for a moment or two. ]Nothing happened.
But he has to agree, his vitals are insane right now. Heart so fast it's irregular beats are noisy and the norm. Adrenaline pumping for no reason, no where to go but around and adound. Everything feels weird. Especially his mouth, his tongue, his throat, his hands; he can't.
He tunes back in enough to hear that she's proud of him, and that.
That.
Just by itself, that nearly breaks him. Actually it does break him, and where he's gone to lean into her he does so more, quietly keeping his emotions to himself as much as he can but goddamn it's like every buzzword in his life at once and he can't always handle it.
His voice is thick, deep with concern and grief, but hoarse with work and other things, and he's just going to stay where he is for a moment or two. ]Nothing happened.
[ There is neither much he can nor wants to do about this change in circumstances to any great degree. He'd like to stop lying on her leg since it's hurting his back, probably her leg, and uncomfortable, but other than that, looking up at her while she basically pins him again. He has her hands, still, but she has him beat with gravity and physics. He'd applaud, if he could.
Kissing though, he's almost positive that that's just a distraction and there she goes saying it wasn't. ] Uh huh. Prove it.
Kissing though, he's almost positive that that's just a distraction and there she goes saying it wasn't. ] Uh huh. Prove it.
He'll be fine as soon as they even out, probably. JARVIS likes me.
[ She's tracking all of them she can keep a hand or an eye on, suddenly regretting that she doesn't have the Sentinel's ability set right now. JARVIS is a good substitute in some ways and he's pretty dedicated to making sure things are all right, but she'd still rather be able to be certain entirely on her own senses. She'll let the computer equipped for it handle the vital signs right now, though, concentrate on the emotion herself. And there's plenty of that.
She slides her hands down to his back and pulls him into a loose hug, still plenty of space and ability to get out if he needs it but she doesn't feel like she's providing him enough shelter right now, not with the feelings coming off of him. Maybe nothing would be quite enough shelter.
When she speaks, it's soft but utterly sure. ] You're still here.
[ She's tracking all of them she can keep a hand or an eye on, suddenly regretting that she doesn't have the Sentinel's ability set right now. JARVIS is a good substitute in some ways and he's pretty dedicated to making sure things are all right, but she'd still rather be able to be certain entirely on her own senses. She'll let the computer equipped for it handle the vital signs right now, though, concentrate on the emotion herself. And there's plenty of that.
She slides her hands down to his back and pulls him into a loose hug, still plenty of space and ability to get out if he needs it but she doesn't feel like she's providing him enough shelter right now, not with the feelings coming off of him. Maybe nothing would be quite enough shelter.
When she speaks, it's soft but utterly sure. ] You're still here.
[ Technically, he totally could applaud, he'd just have to let go of her hands to do it. She pauses in kissing him to wrench her leg out from under him, leaving her free enough to just straddle him. Her hands she leaves in his grip - with this much of an advantage she's okay with that. She can get them back if she really needs them. ]
This is seduction. [ Murmured against his ear before she starts to kiss her way down his neck, rough, special attention to the points she knows are sensitive for him. Kissing him had been almost entirely about distracting him, nothing beyond that it was a kiss really specifically designed for anything further. This - this definitely is. ]
This is seduction. [ Murmured against his ear before she starts to kiss her way down his neck, rough, special attention to the points she knows are sensitive for him. Kissing him had been almost entirely about distracting him, nothing beyond that it was a kiss really specifically designed for anything further. This - this definitely is. ]
[ It's not all that rare for her to go out these days - for errands, sometimes at night when she's feeling restless and feels the need to go beat up people in the name of justice - whatever the reasons, she's comfortable enough in her place here to be able to leave it on occasion.
Lately she hasn't particularly wanted to, in part because there's something - she doesn't know the word she wants there. Tony's hardly sleeping, though, she knows that. He's always gone on even less sleep than her, but lately it's been worse.
She's not entirely sure what to do.
But today she did go out, regardless, just to pick up a few things, and when she comes back she calls out his name into the house and goes wandering down into the workshop when she doesn't receive a response, reaching out with her mind. It's when she brushes against his that she starts moving faster because something's wrong, she can feel it, and she pushes open the door to the workshop and looks for him, trying to calm him as she does. ]
Lately she hasn't particularly wanted to, in part because there's something - she doesn't know the word she wants there. Tony's hardly sleeping, though, she knows that. He's always gone on even less sleep than her, but lately it's been worse.
She's not entirely sure what to do.
But today she did go out, regardless, just to pick up a few things, and when she comes back she calls out his name into the house and goes wandering down into the workshop when she doesn't receive a response, reaching out with her mind. It's when she brushes against his that she starts moving faster because something's wrong, she can feel it, and she pushes open the door to the workshop and looks for him, trying to calm him as she does. ]
[ He hasn't really seen anyone all day. It's just been a nice day of hanging out with the bots, with himself, you know, a good day alone at home with nothing to actually do aside from his own projects. Everyone deserves a day like that. Or maybe more like a week like that. Whatever.
But the rotations hadn't been high enough and he'd nearly beaned himself in the skull with an accidentally flying projectile and then he'd been covered in oil and that hadn't helped, so he'd gone off to take a shower. He'd started to go off and take a shower, and suddenly.
Suddenly he couldn't move. He was stuck, being all but fetal and not able to move. Sitting in his workshop, hands half-clenched and hovering up near his chest but not moving, breathing very shallow and head bowed, effectively stuck in place. ]
But the rotations hadn't been high enough and he'd nearly beaned himself in the skull with an accidentally flying projectile and then he'd been covered in oil and that hadn't helped, so he'd gone off to take a shower. He'd started to go off and take a shower, and suddenly.
Suddenly he couldn't move. He was stuck, being all but fetal and not able to move. Sitting in his workshop, hands half-clenched and hovering up near his chest but not moving, breathing very shallow and head bowed, effectively stuck in place. ]
[ She makes the last steps to him rather faster than normal, stride lengthening until she's catching his hands in hers for a moment before letting them go to slide up and cradle his face, tilting it up towards her. ]
Tony. [ Tone firm and commanding but as gentle as she can be while still holding that. ] Tony, I need you to listen to me. Tell me what's wrong.
[ She can guess a little bit, and she can feel part of it as she tries to work through calming him, but the more he tells her himself the closer she is to pulling him out of this. ]
Tony. [ Tone firm and commanding but as gentle as she can be while still holding that. ] Tony, I need you to listen to me. Tell me what's wrong.
[ She can guess a little bit, and she can feel part of it as she tries to work through calming him, but the more he tells her himself the closer she is to pulling him out of this. ]
[ He's barely recognising her, only responding to her in the barest minimum, out of it in more ways than one. ]
Oil. [ Is all he says for a while. He's suddenly too hot, oh god, too hot and his clothes are covered in oil, oh god, he needs to get them off. The feeling, the smell of it, the heat, he can't stand it, and he brushes her off to start pulling at his shirt somewhat ineffectually. ] Water.
[ She calms him down a little bit, but there's a long way to go. ]
Oil. [ Is all he says for a while. He's suddenly too hot, oh god, too hot and his clothes are covered in oil, oh god, he needs to get them off. The feeling, the smell of it, the heat, he can't stand it, and he brushes her off to start pulling at his shirt somewhat ineffectually. ] Water.
[ She calms him down a little bit, but there's a long way to go. ]
Tony. [ Repetitive and still firm, letting him brush her hands off in favor of helping him with his shirt. If he feels like it needs to come off it can come off. She just wants to get this out of his head, tear it out and keep him safe but that's going to take time and effort. She's more than willing to put them both in, but seeing him like this -
It's the time part she dislikes. He deserves better than this, and the longer it goes on the worse it is for him. ]
What about water? [ The oil she can understand, he's covered in it from all of his work, generally is, but she can't see water anywhere. ]
It's the time part she dislikes. He deserves better than this, and the longer it goes on the worse it is for him. ]
What about water? [ The oil she can understand, he's covered in it from all of his work, generally is, but she can't see water anywhere. ]
[ She helps him get the shirt off and he's grateful, sure, but can't really say it right now, and anyway, it doesn't help as much as he'd thought. He can still feel the residue of it on his skin, still knows it's there, still isn't in the right state of mind to function properly and it's starting to send him back into a panic because oh god oh god what does he do? ]
Shower. I was... because of the oil. But. [ The thought of the small space. Of the water falling on his head. He - just... He can smell the sharp twinge of the oil hitting his olfactory nerves though, can feel the fumes rising off of him, and shit. No thank you. He'd like to try and move again, but he just can't. ]
Shower. I was... because of the oil. But. [ The thought of the small space. Of the water falling on his head. He - just... He can smell the sharp twinge of the oil hitting his olfactory nerves though, can feel the fumes rising off of him, and shit. No thank you. He'd like to try and move again, but he just can't. ]
don't you pft me you are the best there are no two ways about it
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
motherofnemesis
2013-05-04 04:32 am (UTC)(link)
Breathe. [ Running her hands over his shoulders and arms, steady and gentle, trying to show him that everything's all right, there's nothing wrong with his body right now. ] I need you to breathe for me. Just in and out, one breath at a time.
[ She's using the tone she uses when she expects obedience, firm and absolutely sure, nothing about it sounding like questioning is allowed. It may not help, but there's a small chance he could be used to listening to it enough that he will automatically right now, not stopping to let it filter through what he's feeling right now. It's worth a try.
Anything's worth a try, if it helps this. ] We can grab a towel and clean you off at the sink, you don't need a shower.
[ She's using the tone she uses when she expects obedience, firm and absolutely sure, nothing about it sounding like questioning is allowed. It may not help, but there's a small chance he could be used to listening to it enough that he will automatically right now, not stopping to let it filter through what he's feeling right now. It's worth a try.
Anything's worth a try, if it helps this. ] We can grab a towel and clean you off at the sink, you don't need a shower.
[ It takes a second for her words to register, quick and shallow breaths louder for the moment than the authority in her voice. But it does hit, apparently something deeper than whatever the hell is happening to him right now and that's fine, that's good. It's helpful, even though he stops breathing altogether for a second, rebooting the process as it were. Just a few seconds, nothing serious, and then he attempts a full exhalation, shaky and stuttering, but there it is. Then a deep breath in, and that's done much the same way, starting and stopping at points along the way, but it's better than before, and slowly smoothing out.
Smoothing out enough for the analytical part of his mind to come screaming back into action, trying to catalogue everything it can all at once and make sense of it now that the volume on the panic has abated just enough for another channel to be heard. He glances around the room, scanning the immediate area; there's a very quick sweep with his senses, checking everything he can with just a touch so as not to risk anything coming back and hitting him too hard; he even double-checks her with a momentary brush of her mind - not too much contact, because he doesn't want too much contact with anything right now, raw nerve at the mercy of the dust in the air that he is at the moment, but enough to make sure.
He'd probably be talking more if there wasn't so much effort going into that breathing thing she mentioned. It's not until after he's sure he's checked everything that he manages to start breathing through his nose like a normal, not flipping out person, and even then he clearly isn't sure what to do right now. ] It's really hot in here. My - god, face, my whole head is hot. There's so many smells in here.
Smoothing out enough for the analytical part of his mind to come screaming back into action, trying to catalogue everything it can all at once and make sense of it now that the volume on the panic has abated just enough for another channel to be heard. He glances around the room, scanning the immediate area; there's a very quick sweep with his senses, checking everything he can with just a touch so as not to risk anything coming back and hitting him too hard; he even double-checks her with a momentary brush of her mind - not too much contact, because he doesn't want too much contact with anything right now, raw nerve at the mercy of the dust in the air that he is at the moment, but enough to make sure.
He'd probably be talking more if there wasn't so much effort going into that breathing thing she mentioned. It's not until after he's sure he's checked everything that he manages to start breathing through his nose like a normal, not flipping out person, and even then he clearly isn't sure what to do right now. ] It's really hot in here. My - god, face, my whole head is hot. There's so many smells in here.
[ Okay, he's breathing now. That's a good sign, or at least it's a good start. It's a pretty important function, and once you can breathe - the feeling of not being able to breathe is a pretty good panic starter just by itself, and for him in particular. Being able to breathe again should help ease things a little.
The cataloging she just waits on, watching him carefully and leaving herself unshielded so that he can know for certain when he brushes her that it's her, nothing weird going on there. She's had that moment more than a few times, she doesn't want him to have to worry. ]
Do you want to move somewhere else? Would that be better? [ A little softer now, quiet - she doesn't want to overwhelm his hearing if he's started using his senses more actively now. ]
The cataloging she just waits on, watching him carefully and leaving herself unshielded so that he can know for certain when he brushes her that it's her, nothing weird going on there. She's had that moment more than a few times, she doesn't want him to have to worry. ]
Do you want to move somewhere else? Would that be better? [ A little softer now, quiet - she doesn't want to overwhelm his hearing if he's started using his senses more actively now. ]
[ It should, yeah. It's helping a little bit, but he's still not totally back with her yet.
He was using them partially on purpose and partially just because hey that's apparently what anxiety does to you. Makes you really fucking aware of your surroundings. It's a few moments before he responds to her again though. ]
I don't think I can walk yet. It probably would, but I still can't really feel anything so I'm gonna just sit. I think that's a good idea. [ He kind of just doesn't really want to move, because everything feels weird and far away but far far too close and hazy but sensitive and there's so many things to worry about right now that he's not really sure he wants to start on any one of them individually just yet. He doesn't want to aggravate anything, even though it's entirely plausible that just sitting here will do that anyway. There's not really any good answer for this. He's still trying to figure out what happened in the first place. ] Am I bleeding? Does anything look broken?
He was using them partially on purpose and partially just because hey that's apparently what anxiety does to you. Makes you really fucking aware of your surroundings. It's a few moments before he responds to her again though. ]
I don't think I can walk yet. It probably would, but I still can't really feel anything so I'm gonna just sit. I think that's a good idea. [ He kind of just doesn't really want to move, because everything feels weird and far away but far far too close and hazy but sensitive and there's so many things to worry about right now that he's not really sure he wants to start on any one of them individually just yet. He doesn't want to aggravate anything, even though it's entirely plausible that just sitting here will do that anyway. There's not really any good answer for this. He's still trying to figure out what happened in the first place. ] Am I bleeding? Does anything look broken?
[ Anxiety is a strange beast. It can close you off and open you up in the strangest combinations. She waits, hands resting gently on his shoulders as she watches him like a hawk. It's strange to see this look on him, the confusion of it. Tony is the most aware person she knows, always sure of himself. Him not knowing what to do or what's going on is off, it's wrong in all kinds of ways that she hates. ]
Nothing's broken. I don't see any blood anywhere. Physically everything's fine, you don't need to worry about that. [ And with a glance downwards for a moment. ] If anything was wrong with the reactor JARVIS would have said so by now. [ JARVIS provides his assent, and her gaze drifts back to his eyes, still watching, searching for any visible signs. ]
We can sit. [ She tugs another chair up so she can sit down, one leg pressed against his. ] Everything's going to be fine.
Nothing's broken. I don't see any blood anywhere. Physically everything's fine, you don't need to worry about that. [ And with a glance downwards for a moment. ] If anything was wrong with the reactor JARVIS would have said so by now. [ JARVIS provides his assent, and her gaze drifts back to his eyes, still watching, searching for any visible signs. ]
We can sit. [ She tugs another chair up so she can sit down, one leg pressed against his. ] Everything's going to be fine.
[ It takes him a little while to realize that he's probably sending out way, way more than he means to be right now - he's putting too much energy into containing just his physical reaction and the emotions themselves, and it's still not quite a knee-jerk response for him to remember to shield appropriately. The basics, sure, but not enough to actually guard for a nearby Guide who's as invested in all of this as she is. Where he had been hugging her back, almost greedily, because again, she's the anchor, that's it, he pulls away again with the realization, trying to snap them back up the way they ought to be. ] Sorry, I - not supposed to happen like that.
[ He uses the distance to wipe at his face, just in case he needs to, he can't really tell. Everything's on overload and nothing's registering properly, still caught up in things that aren't happening and memories that have. ] This doesn't. This feels worse, this isn't better. It's just closer now. Just... It's all here again.
[ He uses the distance to wipe at his face, just in case he needs to, he can't really tell. Everything's on overload and nothing's registering properly, still caught up in things that aren't happening and memories that have. ] This doesn't. This feels worse, this isn't better. It's just closer now. Just... It's all here again.
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